li0nsback:

reggiesloth:

i liked your selfie because i want to fuck the life out of you

yes

ohi-itswilly:

Dear headphones, could you please stop having sex while I put you in my pocket? Sincerely, tired of untangling.

partytilfajr:

I’ve found that God tests you with what you advise others to do.

sarah-urie:

foodtrucker:

I was born at an incredibly young age

i told this to my english teacher and she almost kicked me out of the class